Friday, 31 December 2010

Every Cloud has a Silver...Camel?

So there I was, 250 rep off Exalted with Rahmakhen, all filled with false hope about my first epic of the expansion. I did the awesome daily quest, to pwn Pygmy's with a mallet and BOOM, Exalted. Queue me silently fist-pumping in celebration behind my computer and a few "gz!" in /g.

As I rushed to the quartermaster, I thought what to enchant my gloves with. Expertise? Agility? Mastery? OMGTHECHOICES!

I landed on the quartermaster, quite literally on him. I was in a rush so there was no time for me to apologise. I frantically clicked to the latter reputation rewards for I had no time for the pittiful honoured items, for I was exalted and I wanted my gloves!

But there weren't any. I was shocked, I wouldn't believe it. I was going through the six stages of "I dun fucked up!"

2. Denial - I dont believe you, Quartermaster...
4. Blame - Fuck you atlas loot
5. Self blame - omfg, Jakk, you absolute n00000b, you looked at the wrong faction
6. Acceptance - fuck it. *Puts Dragonmaw tabard on*

So yeah, I'd got my factions mixed up. Wasn't a happy bunny until I saw that I could buy this...

And I forgot all about my gloves and spent the next 20 minutes running around Orgrimmar going "camelololololololololololololololololol!"

Wednesday, 22 December 2010

Seasons greetings!

Merry Christmas from Slash-Two! Have a crackin' christmas and New Year, I know I will!

Thursday, 16 December 2010

*catches breath*

So I've been a bit quiet recently. I bet you can't guess why!

That's right, Cata is out and I've been knee deep in dragons, pygmys, goblins and worgens. My first impressions where as follows...

*Log in after digital download was complete*
Argent Dawn is full
Your position in the queue: 2833
Estimated Time Remaining: Calculating...

Fuck that for a bag of chips, off to Terenas I go!
*Logs straight in to Terenas - Medium pop servers ftw!*

Mhmm, mess about on the priest or roll a worg-

*Character creation page*

Rolls Worgen warrior, tempted to call it Edworgcullen/Jaycub but resisted, also tempted to create a guild called "Team Jacob".

Mess around on Worgen, everythings pretty grim but at the same time aweeeesome!
Get bored around level 7.

*Log back to Argent Dawn*
NO QUEUE! God bless the little kids mothers, forcing them to go to bed!

*Log in Jakkru, purchase Azeroth flying, explore*

And that's about it, I got Jakkru to 85, faction transferred my mage (he's now a goblin and amazingly cool!) and have been taming pretty looking pets on my hunter for a bit, just being a bit too in awe of how pretty this expansion is to do anything else really!

However, I've not given up on the 20 days of warcraft meme and while queuing for heroics shall be churning those posts out. I loved Pilf's little "where I'd be without Warcraft" post, even if it is soppy and romantic ^^

Oh and if you haven't already, follow me on Twitter ^^

Wednesday, 1 December 2010

20 days of Warcraft: Suggestions

So, if I could suggest something that Blizzard could include in game, what would it be? I was thinking about this earlier and found it hard to actually think of anything.

First off, I was thinking of addon-type things but realised that either Blizzard would try and make it their own and ruin it or it just wouldn't work in the game. Plus, I'm a huge fan of addons and love having a different variety of them that I can full customize. If I had to pick anything that comes from an addon to be incorporated into the game it'd be DPS meters, you can either have them on or turn them off via the Interface menu or something.

Secondly, I thought about something along the lines of Real ID, that just shows if someone is online and not what server or character they're on. There's plenty of folks I'd love to chat to much more in game but they dont like the idea of people knowing what character they're on and when - a few ex-guild members, members of the blogging community and even some people I know IRL would rather use MSN and the likes to keep in contact.

But my last one definitly has to be - MORE CHARACTER SLOTS.

I have no idea if they're adding this with the release of cataclysm but I've been crying out for more slots since early TBC and it's heartbreaking having to delete a character (even if it is a level 13 bank alt that really only gets a log in once a week or so...) and I'm gonna end up having to get rid of one that's a decent level if I want a goblin and Worgen.

So yeah - as an altoholic in need of his fix, I'd definintly nag someone to let me get more character slots!

Monday, 29 November 2010

20 days of Warcraft: Holidays

I dont really have a favourite in-game holiday. I rarely take part in the little quest things and I've only completed one of them fully (Jakkru the Love Fool, had to be done...)

However, I do appreciate when all the major cities are decked out.

So I guess my favourite in-game holiday is probably the same as my favourite RL holiday - Christmas. I love it and the fact that Blizzard stick wreaths, tinsel and x-mas trees everywhere is awesome. The big tree in Orgrimmar is fantastic and I love running around in Undercity, home of the undead to see sprinkles of Christmas cheers, they're the WoW version of the Grinches.

Sunday, 28 November 2010

20 Days of Warcraft: Gold Sellers

Todays topic is - How do you reply to a gold sellers whisper?

They're one of the most annoying things in the entire game. If they're not spamming trade, using hacks to spell out their website in some strange, mass-suicide kinda way they're whispering you.

We've all had one, "Hi, are you busy?"

On my alliance alts, I can automatically put them on Ignore - but on my Horde toons, I cant. I'm an officer in my guild so I can, at times get whispers off people who want an alt inviting to the guild. I'd make a bit of a tit out of myself if I went "Fuck off" to a prospective guild member who only wanted to get in on a bit of /g while levelling.

So, I've devised a method, which is almost fool-proof!

Mystery whisper: Hi, are you busy?
Me: No but if you're a gold seller, fuck off.

That generally works. They'll either be all...

Mystery whisper: lol, no it's me X, can I get a guild invite?
Me: Sure!


Mystery whisper: Are you interested in buying go-
and that's as far as I get, as I've stuck them on ignore.

Some of them are a bit more annoying and dont leave you alone, the persistant little buggers. So I have a backup plan, of only 2 words.

"Free sample?"

Say that to a gold seller and I guarantee, you'll be on ignore quicker than you can put them on.

Saturday, 27 November 2010

20 Days of Warcraft: Real life Class/Race

Today's topic for the 20 days meme is what class and race are you most like in real life?

I quite like todays topic, as it's given me something to think about while I've been lying hungover after my birthday celebrations last night. It's also pretty personal, which is quite new ground for my little WoW blog :D

I'd have to say the class I relate to the most is the Taurens. I'm a big guy in real life, almost 6ft4 and I've played Rugby Union for almost 13 years (as a prop - if you're not sure, google it), so I'm a hefty bugger. At the same time, I'm a 'gentle giant' and actually like to get out into nature, especially on holidays with the family - The Lakes, Scottish Highlands, Ireland etc. However, the sagely wisdom part, I dont have :p Or the deep, awesome sounding voice.

Class wise, I'd have to go with a protection warrior. I'm not one to start fights but if a friend is in one, I'm the first to step in and help. I'm also very protective of people who're close to me.

But at the same time, I dont think I'd be one of the guys risking life and limb in dungeons and raids. I'd be more of an explorer as it's what I loved doing back when I first got the game, I actually spent a lot of time running around Azeroth and not levelling at all - making it to Tanaris at level 15 is pretty impressive for your first character. I'd probably be the friendly chap you ran past while levelling, who's meandering around, with a tent in a bag and generally getting lost in it all.

Friday, 26 November 2010

20 days of Warcraft: 2 days rolled into one! (Pets & Guild names)

With yesterday being taken up (mostly) by my Uni work and levelling Jujin, my Troll Druid, I didn't really have time to get a 20 days post out, which is a shame, so I'm gonna roll the one I missed yesterday into today.

So yesterday was all about vanity pets, which is your favourite and all that jazz. Now in all honesty, I really dont collect them. I dont go out of my way to buy them and I usually just get the ones you're given. I'm not a big vanity pet fan, mainly because I always forget to get them out.

But! That doesn't stop me having a favourite and it has to be the Perky Pug. I love it, it's a right little comical pet. There's nothing better than seeing it wiping it's arse in your fish feast during a raid. Infact, I always stand a bit closer to the fish just to get it to do it, brings a smile to my face everytime I see it. I'm such a big kid...

Now today is all about favourite guild names. Of which I have a few.

Much like Pilf, I love a guild name with a bit of wit or a stupidly bad pun and with the introduction of the LFG system in Wrath, it's increased the amount of guild names that you're exposed to. One of my favourites has to be 'Nananananananana Batman' , which I keep on seeing in randoms when levelling my alts.

However, my favourite guild name is an Alliance all PvP guild called 'Atleast We Have Stables' which I smile at everytime I see it :D

Now, this is a very brief post as I'm taking a break from writing my annoying Uni report and thought I'd bash out a blog post in that time!

Wednesday, 24 November 2010

20 Days of Warcraft: Dungeons

Today's question in the "20 days of" meme is 'What's your favourite dungeon and why?'

This is going to be stupidly hard, because I like most of the dungeons in the game. Infact, it'd be a lot easier if I was asked which dungeons I dont like.

However, I do have a few dungeons that I have more of a soft-spot for when compared with the others. Here's my top three.

Zul'farrak - I love this place. I remember when it was pretty difficult actually, instead of the laughable thing it's become now. I'll always remember how hard, and jaw-droppingly amazing the staircase section was. Hordes of trolls, charging at you and the freed prisoners? Fan-bloody-tastic. Now? You just pull the entire of them in one go and AoE them down - doing that back in the day was suicide.

Scarlet Dungeons (minus Graveyard) - I've always been a fan of these instances. They're where I first learnt about CC on my rogue and I really enjoyed sneaking around unlocking the chests they have hidden while my comrades where busy fighting, great fun! It's where I truely fell in love with the rogue class which makes it that little bit special. (1-2-3: AWWWWWH)

Shattered Halls - This is a favourite because it's so very hard. Hard with a capital OMFGOUCHOUCHOUCH. The gauntlet for this was a fantastic challenge and I bonded with some new (now veteren) members of the guild over our hatred for the place when we were stuck in there one time.

For me, what makes an dungeon is the memories you create in there, with the people you run it. Sure, it helps if the layout is nice, it's pretty and there's interesting monsters but you could say that about the Northrend instances, and I really dont like those due to bad memories with bad players via the LFDungeon tool.

Tuesday, 23 November 2010

20 days of Warcraft - Names

So, a new day brings a new topic - The meaning behind your mains name.

Now, my main is Jakkru and the meaning behind his name is pretty dull... (TL;DR version below :p)

Back before I played WoW, I was an avid Guild Wars fan. For those of you that haven't played it, your name must be two words or something like that, for example "Jakkru lol" would count as a name, whereas "Jakkrulol" wouldn't.

When I first rolled a character, I had a theme, I'd name any character I had after something associated with the class and add my name at the end. For example:

My first character was initially going to be called Warmaster Jack. Until I realised that it sucked.

So off I went to trust google to find a translation for my name in a different language and found (I later found out this isn't actually correct...) that Jack in Japanese is Jakku! Awesome, I thought and I rolled my first Guild Wars character - Warmaster Jakku!

When I made the transition to Warcraft, I inititally rolled an Orc, for which Jakku didn't quite fit so the name was forgotten until I was trying to think of a name for my Undead rogue, it popped back in my head!

I don't know why but when typing Jakku under my character I felt strange, like it didn't fit how he looked. I spent about 10 minutes thinking of a variation then came up with Jakkru and to me, it fitted.

So, the TL;DR version of that is - I thought it meant Jack (my actual name) in Japanese with an R added.

However, it's not my favourite named character, that'd have to be Coggins, my gnome warrior ^^

Monday, 22 November 2010

20 Days of Warcraft: Favourite Emote

This is a tough one, mainly because I use a wide range of emotes. When I first thought about it, I came up with these...

/point, followed by a /laugh

Before Real ID was introduced, emotes were the main way I could communicate to my Horde friends if I was running around on Krinkal. If I was on Vent and they weren't, /talk was my way of telling them to get on Vent, because I was bored and wanted to chat.

When running around Dalaran (which seems to be not just my past time but a large amount of level 80's on Argent Dawn as well) I'll bump into people I know - long time friends, new acquantances, guildies or people I know on a different faction. Depending on who they are and how well I know them, I use a different emote. It's like a social heirarchy of emotes, with the people I've known the longest, or see as close-close friends get a /love, where-as people I dont know much get a /poke. People in the middle get /hug or /tickle and if I'm bored, I'll /dance with anyone! (I know, I'm such a slut...)

/point followed by /laugh is my long winded way of going "lol" but as an Undead, it's great to watch them /point, which for anyone who's never played an UD male, looks like you're calling them out for a fight followed by a /laugh which is the complete opposite, as his ribcage collapses and you can just imagine him weezing his little, lifeless lungs out in hysterics.

However, I'd missed one of the list and it's the one I like the most - /silly. I could literally spend an entire 10 minute raid break just spamming it, laughing at the bad puns, daft jokes or pop-culture references that all the different races have.

Now you know mine, what's your favourite emote?

Sunday, 21 November 2010

20 Days of Warcraft: Favourite NPC

Now, out of the first three days this is by far the easiest question for me to answer.

My favourite NPC will forever be, High Overlord Saurfang. I know, it sounds generic but I have my reasons.

On my first every character, when I was but a level 9 newb, running around killing Boars in Durotar, I stumbled upon this MASSIVE city. Later, I would realise this was the home of the Orcs but back then, I saw that the guys with the spikey shoulderguards were Green, so I wandered in.

Now, I'd been pottering around there for a good 30 minutes, amazed by the size and scale of the place. I had also stumbled upon Saurfang as I entered and thought he just looked so very cool, with his spikey shoulders. (I was actually a little obsessed with shoulderguards from level 1-17, I think I might very well be as the Shoulders are the first thing I'll upgrade if possible...). I continued my little self-given tour when something I hadn't seen before popped up in my chat box.

Orgrimmar is under attack!
Orgrimmar is under attack!

Oh no! I thought, I must save the Orcs! So I ran out of the Auction House, which I was currently checking out, to kill whatever was attacking the city (I was hoping it was boars, I had plenty of experience doing that)

But instead, it was a decently sized Alliance raid. Now, I'm not stupid (sometimes) and decided that I would just watch, as the higher level people battled it out. I was watching for about 2 minutes until Saurfang stepped in. Someone must have managed to lure one of the alliance toons into his aggro radius (or he just tired of their foolishness, I like to think it's this one) but he just charged straight at them and in about 30 seconds they were dead. I was shocked and amazed in equal measure.

And that's why he's my favourite NPC, when I got to fight by his side in Northrend, I had the same reaction as the undead NPC that you go with, I was honoured and amazed. In Icecrown, when he's on the gunship, cleaving away it's awesome and even when I'm against him on my alliance characters, I'm secretly rooting for him.

Oh and in Soviet Russia, Saurfang still cleaves you.

Tweet, tweet.

So, I created my twitter account today. I was a bit bored, sick of doing work and decided that another website to visit during procrastination time was required.

My thingy is Jakkru (oh yeah, how original?) and I've already got two 'followers' and by followers, I mean bots that are supposebly hot women who really, really like guys who's bio confesses they're a geek - I must be in luck!

However, I have no idea how to use it. Literally, no idea. So...can someone me?

Oh and the 3rd part of the 20 Days of Warcraft will be up later today, if/when I get my work done!

Saturday, 20 November 2010

20 days of Warcraft: Favourite Race

Unlike the favourite class, my favourite race is pretty easy to decide. Undeads are the clear winner in my eyes. Their animations, emotes and voices are just a cut above the rest.

Want to do a backflip in melee? Just roll a female Undead. Wanna spin while you win? Just roll a male undead. Want to look like you're too fucking cool for school while casting a spell? Roll a male undead! Want to look like you're ripping magic out of the air? Female undead is for you. In my opinion, the Undeads combat animations are the best.

Their animations? Are pretty creepy - an Undead male throwing a kiss at you? Yeah, that's weird but the noise that goes with it makes it more comically creepy. I also love the dance, it suites the class extremely well as do the /silly, they're very Jack Dee and by that, I mean morbidly humorous.

Their lore ain't too bad either, using the Horde for their own means? Ohhhh yeah. Selfish bastards the lot of them but at the same time, they seem to have a resemblence of a 'heart' in that (on occasion) they have gone out of their way to help someone, with no actual gain to themselves.

Their capital city is stupidly easy to navigate and granted, it could do with a bit of colour on the walls but come on! They're undead, it's not gonna be pink and orange but more, grey on grey. It's also home to Sylvannas, who in recent times has stop being a stupid little banshee that did naff all and is actually a bad-ass shadow-hunter-sarcastic-bitch.

However, I'm not die-hard Undead, my character sheet is actually quite varied. I wont do as Issy did and get a graph on the go but I try to get a male and female of each race, just because I like the variety. The only exception to this is my two gnomes, who are both male, with pink hair and great big bushy beards!

I've got to admit, that I actually have a soft-spot for gnomes, it's nice to view the world from a shorter perspective, mainly because I'm quite tall in the real-world. Oh and they can have pink hair and still look pretty damned cool and I feel the same form of 'comfort' (so to speak) when playing them as I do when running, hunch-backed around on my Undeads. Still, the gnomes fall short (har-har, height pun!) in my racial-affections.

So then, what's your favourite race and why?

Friday, 19 November 2010

20 days of Warcraft: Favourite Class

So, I've never properly done one of these before and I saw Pilf's post pop up on my feed. Aparently she yoinked it from this blog, which is a new one to me and yet another to add to my reading list (which I spend more time reading than the one for my university course...)

As the title suggests, it's all about your favourite class in Warcraft, which is actually a pretty hard question for me to answer. I'm an altoholic, with a bunch of different classes at level 80 and I enjoy playing all of them.

My main since the middle of TBC has been my rogue, Jakkru, but he wasn't my first character. That was my warrior (who's name/faction and race have changed many a time) who I spent almost a year levelling, running around as a protection specced noob, taking an hour to kill one mob and attempting to learn how to tank in a variety of instances. For that time, warrior was my favourite class, as it was all I knew. I got bored when I was struggling through the Plaguelands while levelling my warrior so decided to roll a few alts, one of them being a rogue. I got him to around level 20 before returning to the warrior and didn't play him again until I was level 70 and had been tanking for a few months.

That's pretty much what happened whenever I rolled a new alt, I played it for a bit, went back to playing my rogue and then levelled the alt again when I got bored, which makes putting a favourite label on it pretty difficult.

However, I think they'll always be a place in my heart for rogues. I've done so many things with them, be it raiding, PvPing or soloing and there was a time when I had such a thirst for the class mechanics I was constantly reading about them. I've never really had that for any other class, even though I do enjoy playing them all it's my rogue that I return to when I want to feel 'normal' and just do something that's second nature.

Oh and sneaking around is just made of win. That's definintly a positive.

On a different note, I'm quite excited by this little meme, I've been playing WoW for a while now and I've really not stopped to think about these things. It'll give me something to think about, take my mind of things that are/have happened and give me a good excuse to procrastinate from University work.

Wednesday, 17 November 2010

Rest in Peace, brother.

Today has been a tough day. I, among many others, have lost a dear friend and guild member and the world has lost one of the very few genuinely nice people.

Mats HÃ¥limoen, otherwise known as Erc passed away after a fight against cancer, yesterday. Wulfy, who shared The Barrens Chat with him wrote a beautiful post.

I saw him as one of my best friends, even though I'd never met him face to face. We'd spend hours talking complete rubbish, but it never felt like hours, more like minutes.

We shared the good and the bad times, he was always there to listen to my rants, talk to me when needed and to correct my English. He was one of the most kindest human beings I've had the pleasure to know and I'm proud to have called him my friend.

I hope Erc, where-ever you are, you know how many people you affected in a good way. You where the reason I started my blog, you encouraged me to express my feelings towards a game we both shared a passion for and which will not be the same without you in it.

I never got to say goodbye, Mats. So here it is - goodbye, I'm glad you're at peace and I know where-ever you are, the people around you are better for you being there.

Monday, 8 November 2010

Warcraft, curing your fears 1 by 1.

Okay. Before I go on, I have to stress, no laughing - okay?


I'm serious.


I've had a fear for as long as I can remember of anything (be it a film, game or a picture) that has a zombie in it.


I will openly admit to being soft and this is definitly backed up by the fact for the first year of my WoW 'career' I avoided any areas that had zombies, even something that looked like a zombie in it. I even had to read up on Undead lore to find out that they were, as I told myself so I could roll Jakkru, 'cured' of their zombie-ness.

Now, once I got to level 50, I really didn't know where to go in levelling places, and was told by some kind person in guild that the Plaguelands were a decent choice so I skipped my way there, thinking "awesome sauce, time to PWN some slimes and stuff to level 60!" Oh how wrong I was. It was like my worse nightmare, I was num-locking my way through while talking to one of my parents and suddenly looked back to find my poor, Orcish self getting mauled by zombies. I was terrified. Absolutely. Not even kidding. I'm being cereal. I was repeating "no, no, no, no." and as this was my first character in WoW, I'd died MANY a time but this was by zombies, which was waaaaaaay worse.

So I died and I was at the spirit thingy and I was a little shaken, I'll admit, I'd just saw my poor Orc pwn'd by zombies and what did I want to do? Curl up into the featol position? No! I wanted to go and fuck some zombie shit up. They'd cost me repair bills, I had, after about 9-10 years of everyone just telling me "they're no real," realised that there was nothing to fear.

However, I still couldn't watch zombie movies. I'll admit, I'd forced myself to watch Shaun of the Dead because I saw the word "comedy" but I spent half my time hiding behind my hands and the other half laughing. That was until Wrath hit and I had no choice but to kill undead/zombies/whateverthefuckyouwannacallthem. I had to kill LOTS and in doing so, I kinda just didn't give a shit anymore, I mean maybe it's because I'm nearly 20 (I said at the start - no laughing, m'kay?!) and have finally grown-the-fuck-up but I like to think that from going to avoiding areas with undead in them to literally plowing through them to get to 80 has definintly made my silly fear less.

Why am I writing this? Cuz I just finished watching the first two episodes of this new american tv show (I think it was a comic before that...) with that guy from teachers in it. The Walking Dead is awesome-sauce and I like to think I owe Warcraft something for helping get over my fear of the shuffling, groaning things.

Tuesday, 26 October 2010

Pre-expansion blues and me.

I've hardly been on Warcraft in the past 2 weeks. I've logged in now and then to have a bit of a chat with the guilides and some friends but other than that, I've just been running round in circles in Dalaran. So it's not surprising that I came to the conclusion that I am bored of the game currently.

The patch, with all it's new changes and stuff was supposed to inspire me, or something. Many of the people in guild have started to play more due to the changes to their class etc but I've found it less of an incentive to play.

Don't get me wrong, I dont mind the changes at all, they were fun for a 2 day lets-have-a-look-at-what's-new binge but now, I really dont know what to think.

I liked to hop between my alts, level my Paladin for a bit, do a random on the forever stuck at 74 warlock or maybe a few heroics on an 80 if I got -that- bored but now, I dont.

I dont know why but the recent changes have made me feel like everything is getting a little too similar. I dont level my paladin anymore, as she feels like a cross between a rogue and warrior, my two oldest characters and ones I've got the most played time on.

Forever stuck at 74 warlock feels to much like an old school hunter and my hunter after about 2 randoms starts to feel like a really, really broken rogue. Which is a shame because I was looking forward to the focus change the most out of all the changes.

I've, however, been liking the mage the most, because frost is 'cool' (har har, a pun!) and I like the pretty floating procc things that Blizzard have put in. The warrior is same-old, same-old but with a angry version of mutilate and the DK is weird but the kind of weird that you like. However, being a stones throw from Cataclysm, the perfectionist in my has kinda turned that robot off Hitchikers Guide - "Oh what's the point!" seeing as they'd just be collecting shiney gear that will be sold, destroyed or disenchanted as soon as I reach level 82.

Ah well, roll on Cata, roll on Goblins and roll on something that's new. Jakk's had enough of this expansion, it's too fucking cold and I've done nothing but kill undead for the past few months.

Thursday, 21 October 2010


Since moving back up to Newcastle and getting back into the swing of things at University, I've not had that much time for WoW and when I have it's mainly been to log in, chat and log back out again.

I'd also had no time to read up about the changes in the patch, so when, one boring Wednesday afternoon I attempted to log in to find that 4.0.1 had been dropped on my face, I was like "ohhhh shiiii-"

I'm still pretty confused, having spent 90% of my time attempting to kill the training dummies on my characters and the other 10% was running around trying to tame new pets on Korgah. I have however realised one thing - I dont need a big-fuck-off-glowing-thing around Frostbolts, Blizzard, I kinda know what my main filler is for a Frost mage...

More to come when I finally get to do something other than go "How much for a glyph?!"

Wednesday, 15 September 2010


I took a longer look than usual at my character selection sheet the other day and came to the sudden realisation that I'm a massive melee whore, of my level 80's, 3 of them are melee. I like playing all three, as they've all got different play styles but at the same time, I feel like a rogue when playing my Frost DK, I dunno why, I just do.

So I thought it was time for a change and respecced my 2handed "OS" to Bloodtonk. This was my first roadblock, as I really had no idea about DK tanking. I quickly armouried Abso's main DK tank and grabbed his specc, then respecced, as I'd just specced blood DPS by accident *facepalm*

After the tank specc was sorted, I decided to grab whatever tank gear I might have accumulated over the few months I've been at 80. So off I trot to the bank, to be greeted by a bank vault with a pink dress, some stupid Halaa battlemarks and buff food in it. I obviously hadn't collected any tank gear.

I did a few randoms and in time, had some blues with defense on from some dungeon or other and the T9 gloves. At this point, I'd be queuing as dps, waiting 10-15 minutes and then doing the dungeon. I'd had enough and thought I'd learn by diving into the deep end. Except, this deep end was full of big, fuck-off crocodiles.

I get a healer friend from guild to come along and in we go, me with my 470 defense, 28k hp unbuffed and 5/13 peices of tank gear.


Pit of Saron heroic. I almost shit my pants. My healer friend actually did. It wasn't gonna be a nice dungeon run for him and as a first time DK tank, I was pretty damned scared but we actually did it, something happened, stars alligned, moons did something that astronomers say they do to sound "intelligent" when infact, they're just writing bollocks in a paper and we got through the entire dungeon without 1 wipe!

I put it down to awesome cooldown management, of course but in all truth it was my healer friends awesome healing that stopped me from looking like a massive fool. We even ran a few more heroics and I got a bit more tank gear, increasing my health and defense by tiny, tiny amounts.

I really did enjoy myself, it was kinda like dps except I'm y'know, getting twatted in the face by angry monsters/humans/undead/things and I liked dictating the pace of the pulls, instead of having the hang around waiting for senoir slow or almost die trying to keep up with speedy gonzales.

It's also gave me something to work on in the end of expansion bordem, as the perfectionist inside me is screaming out for me to get my arse up to 40k unbuffed and start tanking ICC10. Should be fun for me but it'll be hell for those unlucky enough to find themselves stuck with my tanking! *evil, tank like laugh*

Sunday, 12 September 2010

who said that?

Bad things tend to happen when I get bored. I jump at chances to get un-bored so when a friend of mine Alliance side asked me if I was free to help them take on the Lich King, I jumped at the chance. 9/10 of the members where from my mates guild, so I thought it'd be a nice easy night, they had a Kingslayer and apparently their best attempt was P3. So with that, I got the vent details and hopped in. Now, not people able to match voices to names because I dont use the retarded Overlay, I was apparently in a group with...

a soft-spoken scotsman.
a posh fella
someone with a very thick eastern-european accent
a monotinous german
a silent shadowpriest
fanboy of the monotinous german
someone who'd learnt english from american films
a silent tank
and someone who could barely be heard

We gave him a shot, and was almost into P3 when there was a huge mess up. Our silent SP wasn't paying attention and after dropping his defile, didn't move fast enough, which caused it to chain. I dusted my little Gnomish knees off and got ready for another attempt.

It's quite depressing that our first attempt was also our best. Our monotinous german wanted to twat anything in sight, regardless of how much aggro a tank had on it, causing in adds running wild during the Transition phase. This didn't help the fact our silent shadowpriest was more than likely silent due to being a retard than not having a working microphone, as he just couldn't stop making useless mistakes - not moving when he got the plague? oh yeah. mind searing the Lich King for shits and giggles? hell yes! and last but not least, not dps'ing the frozen orbs resulting in the entire raid going BOOM-AARRRRrrrrrrrrr--*splat*

Now, after about 5 more attempts, our monotinous german started, from as far as I could tell (it's a bit difficult when a guys voice sounds like he's in a perma-state of "meh) get angry. First it was the Silent SP's fault, then the tanks, then the healers, then the tanks, then the healers, then the SP and then the tanks again.

This anger spread, mainly due to his fanboi getting in on the act, gleefully pointing out that everyone elses dps was lower than the monotinous germans! Which was like throwing fire on a monotinous bonfire! "Yes, they all lack the skill to do LK" he said.

I snapped...a little bit. I actually managed to hold my tongue but for the attempt afterwards, I didn't single target dps, instead, I put Living Bomb on anything that moved and used Flamestrike as soon as it was up. To which I went "oh look, I can AoE too" in /ra after our wipe from a terribly placed defile.

A few wipes later and it just fell apart, I've never heard so much negativity on my life. The word "Fail" was wrote/spoke for times than when A level papers are marked and with that much negativity flying around, it was as if the Lich King had a new ability, something that affects you after death and keeps going, like Ressurection Sickness but it only affects dickheads, the voices on vent had turned to...

the soft-spoken scot was still soft-spoken and scottish
the posh fella sounded like he was complaining over the phone, to a foreign phone operater - he did a lot of shouting and repeated himself about 20 times.
the thick accented eastern european was stuck on the words "omg how are we failing?"
the german was still monotinous.
shadowpriest was still silent
the monotinous germans fanboy was following in his "heros" footsteps and just being a dickhead
our american film fella had turned into a whiny camp sounding american with a terrible accent
our tank was no longer silent and was correcting anything that was said by the monotinous german using combat logs
and the guy who couldn't be heard now could and all he was doing was swearing.

Needless to say, the so called "raid leader" who in all honesty only held that title because it said [RL] next to his name in the combat logs, called the raid almost an hour a fifteen minutes before the end time. Much to my relief.

It really did make me appreciate my guild(s). Both present and past, mainly because I've so far not found one that has more than 1 dickhead, who usually gets booted in a few hours because they've been found out to be a...dickhead. It also made me appreciate knowing who's talking, so you can tell them to shut the fuck up if needed.

Tuesday, 7 September 2010

The "lesser" of two evils is actually quite fun

My Alliance characters on Argent Dawn are stupidly poor, and no one's to blame but me. I'm lazy, when it comes to dailies and levelling my (rather poor gold making) professions. I recently got in a guild with an old friend Alliance side (until other plans come into affect!), he actually helped the process a lot actually and they seem like a very nice bunch of people. They also raid 25 mans, which I did say I wasn't too keen on but at the same time, I'll try anything once except incest and morris dancing.

I've been trying to get rid of all my blue quality gems and at the same time, regem for fire and with my lack of cash, I either had to queue for dungeons or PvP. I'm impatient so I chose PvP.

Now, I've never really PvP'd anything other than a hunter or rogue, so mage was a very, very steep learning curve but I find out pretty damned fast that...

-I need PvP gear.
- Keep the hell away from anything with a big-fuck-off axe/mace/sword and an angry look on their face.
- Living Bombing pets is a bad idea.
- I need PvP gear.
- I dont like warriors.
- I need PvP gear.

Now, I dont have the badges and/or the honour to spend on PvP gear, so I thought I'd attempt to make do with running around with 18k hp, being a massive target to anything that wants an easy honour kill and spamming Living Bomb on everyfuckingthingthatmoves™ (except for pets! BAD IDEA!) I also decided on doing the following...

- Stayed with a group. On my own, I'm about as useful as a cat in a bin. In a group, I can be that little guy that stands behind the big one going "Yeaaaah!" But in this case, instead of going "Yeaaaaah!" I'm actually THROWING FIRE IN YOUR FACE!
- Ice Block is the universal sign for "Arrrrrrgh! I'm dyyyyyying! Heal meeee!"
- Ice Block is also a very big Warrior/Rogue/DK magnet, meaning that while you're iceblocked, they're hitting you and not your friends!
- He who runs, often finds a friend who's bigger and badder that what's chasing you.

After that, it got fun. I farmed 36k honour in about 3 hours and got a bunch of achievements, I'm in love with Warsong Gulch and Isle of Conquest but I still hate Eye of the Storm with a passion but I hate it slightly less than running in circles in Dalaran waiting for the dungeon timer...

Friday, 3 September 2010

Trial by fire

The Alliance side has ground to a halt. The guild I'm in is going through some management changes, lost some of it's main raiders and hasn't fielded a full, competent team for almost a month now. I've decided it's time to start looking around for a new guild, which is something I'm really not used to doing.

I've got a few friends Alliance side and I mentioned this to one, who offered me a trial raid right then and there. If I liked it and they liked me I could pop on the forums and put up an application. I got invited, summoned and was stood, infront of this 61 million HP monster - the Lich King. I have to admit, I was a little scared.

I was then told, it was a "wipe night" and that they were trying to master controlling the Valkyrs and Defiles, which is apparently quite difficult on 25 man. I said I didn't mind, while I quickly sold some un-used epics to front the repair bills.

First thing I noticed, was that I was significantly out geared. There were 3 other mages, all in Sanctified gear, 264 weapons and trinkets etc etc. The second thing I noticed was that I was the 5th lowest dps.

I'm used to being 1st or 2nd in most of my alliance side raids but here, I didn't even get a say in the top 10 the majority of the time. These guys knew how to dps and from our first try (55%) they also had a basic grasp of tactics. The best attempt of the night was a 37% wipe and it became apparent that a few people were making the same mistakes over and over, which was costing the raid group.

After the raid ended, I was mulling over applying, my friend said he'd link me their site the day after as he had to log quickly and it gave me the night to think it over. I was on the fence for a while, I mean, it could definitly give me a boost in gear as the majority of the casters didn't need anything from normal 25 man anymore but at the same time...25 man raiding just doesn't suite me. I like 10 man raids, there was no friendly banter on their voice chat (still using TS! lol) and it all got a little bit too serious at times, with the raid leaders blood pressure rising as fast as the decibels of his voice.

I've still got some other options which I might find better suited for me and I'm always up for a cheeky server transfer or something if need be but looking for a new guild is harder than I thought it would be...

Sunday, 22 August 2010

Ironically named guilds.

I've been getting bored recently. Spending more time on my lower level alts than I have on my 80's but yesterday, I was running around in circles in Dalaran on Coggins (my recently transferred warrior...gnomes, ftw) and saw a guild advertising that they needed a dps for a quick ICC10 run. They'd already killed Sindragosa and had Plague and Blood left to do before taking on the LK.

My first thoughts? Crackin'! I'll have a bit of that! So off I went, sending a /w, telling them I had experience of all bosses and that my rogue and shaman were Kingslayers. I then had to go for a gear inspection, while one of their members took a look on the armoury at Jakkru and Kranan. This reinforced my feelings that this would be good, I mean...they'd killed Sindragosa and finding a dps was very srs bizniss.

I got my invite and myself and the two advertisers were summoned to ICC, outside Festergut, all ready and raring. Awesome. We killed him right quick, Rotface too. Infact, I got a new kill record on both and finally reached 11k dps as fury! /cheer

There was a quick break before Putri, as one of the healers so subetly put, needed a shit. After his return, we made tracks to Putricide. Quick and easy kill, I thought and got into position under the green slime pump. This is where it kinda got a little weird.

Where is everyone? Was my first reaction. I took a quick look around and they're all over the other side of the room. Apparently, they dont believe the hugging tactic works and instead, like to do the highly-fucking-annoying-ring-around-a-fucking-rosie-tactic.

I'll cut about 13 wipes short and tell you that if they hadn't been using that retarded tactic, they'd have killed him the 2nd attempt. The time spent for all the dps to run from one side of the room back into the range of Putri, caused him to spawn another gas before P3, which we had to kill and he wiped us with around 100k health, which would have been what we'd have got off him if we didn't have to kill the gas cloud if we didn't have to run across the fucking room to fucking kill in the-ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH.

Now, I was a little pissed off, I mean, I had high expectations of this run, it'd seemed perfect - guild run, check. Sindragosa already dead? Well, I wouldn't get the frostwing halls achievement but fuck it, check. Decently geared people? Check.

After the Putricide fiasco, we moved onto Blood quarter, where the raid was called before we even got to the Princes, as they were wiping so hard on trash.

So I got my ress and hearthstoned, thinking "retards" but saying "thanks for the raid, was just unlucky!" The icing on this specific fail-cake was that the guild called Progress didn't make any. This shit writes itself sometimes.

Thursday, 5 August 2010

bordem in pit of saron...

Jaina = J
Sylvanas = S

I got bored :D


Jakk: So, you two spend a lot of time in Pit of Saron, how're you both finding it?

J: I hate it! All those innocent people dying, it's terrible!
S: Well, I quite like it. For the same reason Jaina stated.

Jakk: All the time you're in there, ever cross each others paths?

S: Jaina keeps trying to get me to join her book club, they just read My Sisters Keeper over and over and cry...
J: It's a very good book!
S: I'm sure it is but do you really have to cry after your 20th read through?
J: I'm a very emotional person, Sylvanas!

Jakk: Well, people from both factions are well aware of that...Jaina.

J: And they're also aware that Sylvanas is a right heartless bitch!
S: Since when have you been from the North of England, Jaina? Last time I looked you had a pretty terrible American Accent going on.
J: And you sound like a prostitute.
S: Oh no. Your hateful words cut me deep...I may just cry.
J: Dont mock me!
S: You mock yourself!
J: Dont!
S: Do!

Jakk: Ladies, ladies. Let's not fight, we know the Horde and Alliance relationship is very fragile at the moment...

S: Maybe if they didn't cry all the time...
J: And maybe if they didn't have long, boring talks before boss fights.
S: I'd rather have one before a boss fight than after. Especially if it's going on when the group of 10 or 25 heros have already killed that big ugly thing that Professor Putricide has created. Yeah I've heard. About 20 minutes of that is you sobbing like a baby because your "King" as you so obidently call him lets someone past him.
J: Oh shut up...
S: Seriously, how do you manage if visiting a hotel. Do you just stand in the lobby crying...
J: Shut up.
S: What if someone's just being plain polite, do you shed a single-solitary-tear?
J: I hate you.
S: Go read My Sisters Keeper again.
J: Maybe I will!
S: Fine.
J: Fine.

*Jaina teleports out*

Jakk: Well...

S: What? She annoys me...

Jakk: Fair enough.

Friday, 30 July 2010

I'ma chargin' mah healzor! (Literally...)

Absolution recently won 10 beta keys via that competition thing that Blizzard had. I wasn't part of the screen shot and I was quite glad actually as I'm not a fan of betas. I've done one in the past and I actually stopped playing the game because it kinda ruined it for me.

I like opening the box like a little kid of christmas day, waiting so very impatiently, as the thing installs and then being "Oooooooh! New and Shiny and shiny and new!" while playing it.

I've been shying away from anything they've been saying. When they talk about it on mumble, I mute the person or take my headphones out and it's going well but I actually listen to what's being said when they talk about class changes.

I dont mind hearing about those, just little bits - how talents are working etc and I've got to say, from taking a look at stuff on WowHead and all that and at the moment other classes have started to take my fancy a little bit more than my rogue.

I suppose having a fair few 80's (6, working on my 7th) will help as I'll have a lot to choose from but at the moment I've been drawn to the idea of a goblin priest.

I've reserved the name and everything and I'm genuinely excited about rolling it. I can see it now in a PuG, when I'm up for being a bit of an annoying bastard...

Tank: h33l m3! omfffffffffffg 1m dy1ng
Me: 100g please.
Others: wuuuuuuuuuuuut? omfg (gogogogogogogogogogogogo)
Me: I'm a goblin. Time is money, friend. 100g per heal.
Others: omffffffffffg *votekick*

Either that or I go shadow and charge 10g per DoT and 5g per Mind Flay tick...

I'd suggested this in /g when I'd first thought about being a goblin healer and Wulfy had said he was thinking of a goblin tank. We could go into business, be right little greedy gobbos!

Tuesday, 27 July 2010

yeaaaaah boiiiiiii

It's been a long time coming but after only 5 attempts...

and with that, of course...

Mumble was full of woops, I think a few people might have got a bit too 'excited' and I was grinning ear to ear. Absolution may have been a little late to the party but we're there now and we're downing a bottle of anything we can get our grubby little hands on!

Now that's done, I've got to thinking, what next?

I'm sure there's Hardmodes to be attempting but I was thinking more of what else can I do this expansion. My only real goal was the kill the Lich King before Cataclysm hit and I've done that. Buff or not, he's dead and I'm gloriously happy.

I guess I'll stick to alting around, getting my characters some better gear, levelling my warlock and paladin and waiting for cataclysm just like everyone else. I've got my Goblin priests name all lined up and everything!

Oh yeah, did I mention...


Yeah, that's right. I squee'd. Sue me.

Wednesday, 14 July 2010

Just because it says RP doesn't mean you have to

Everyone seems to think of RP realms as being these strange places inhabited by weird people that talk like they live in something Chaucer wrote.

We've had a few applications at Absolution recently from people that have server transferred from PvP and Normal realms to these RP realms and all of them have commented on how they believe the people on RP realms to be more mature. Sometimes I cant believe they're applying to join us if they believe there's more mature people on Argent Dawn...

Anyways. People who roll on RP realms are either:

a) Looking to RP.
b) Have friends on the server that have told them that it's not all Shakespearian and shit.
c) Are noobs and thought that RP stands for Really Powerful
d) Got the name mixed up with something said on Die Hard

(I fit category d, if you're wondering...)

But with people transfering from different servers to join more "mature" raiding guilds, I have to agree with Ereios that there's been a shift from RP to a more...PvE feel. Trade is now filled with LFG spam, trolls and just general chit-chat between players. Gone are the days you'd have people in Silvermoon going ((Keep Trade IC please)) when someone was spamming it with LFG messages.

I've been on an RP server for most of my WoW playing days and I've never once RP'd "properly." I truely cant. I had an "RP" set, which consisted of a pink dress, a really, really over-sized mace and a bouquet of flowers - I really dont take it seriously at all.

This is because RP servers are what you make of them. You can PvP until your hearts content, raid until your eyes hurt or you get wankers cramp from button bashing or, you can find others with an RP'ing interest and just enjoy yourself.

The RP on the server page is more of a huge banner saying "You can RP here!'re not going to get ganked, we cant guarantee you're not going to get asked to cyb0r though..."

RP realms aren't full of mature people, every realm has about the same amount, you've just got to look hard enough. The only difference between an RP server and others is you can report the stupid bastards who're called "Arthazz" and "Lickkhing"

Friday, 9 July 2010

and now for something completely different...

With the internets currently turning a firey red, looking at Blizzard like it would very much like to reach through their screens and beat seven shades into them I could write a post about RealID. About how I dont mind the in-game features, as it lets me keep in contact with cross-realm, cross-faction friends but how I feel they've crossed a massive line with all this RealID on the forums bollocks.But I'm not. Like Tam did, I'm gonna have a tea and biccy break from it all. I mean, I've read everyone elses views, saw the forum petitions and heard folk even talking about it in game. My views are basically the same but would be shown without a solid arguement and a lot more uses of the words "fuck" "bellends" and "seriously Blizzard, you're all twats sometimes."


I love little things that Developers put into games. References to famous people, films, books and the like. I found myself smiling when, in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare, a guy pulls out a shotgun while quoting Aliens. The developers must have loved that film, because they've stuck the cat in there as well.
My favourite is most definintley this one:

Found in Booty Bay, he ends up giving you something so you can use the transporter to get to Gnomeregan.

When you pop out on the other side, you find this guy...

First saw this when I was levelling Jakkru and it put a massive smile on my face. I love these kind of Easter Eggs!

If you've got any favourites either link them in the comments or stick a blog post up :) Just poke me to let me know they're there!

Wednesday, 7 July 2010

Guild meetups are AWESOME!

I've just spent a fantastic two days back in my "new home" up in Newcastle. After a weekend of trying to sort out bills and being generally bored because of lack of TV, lack of internet and lack of House-mates it was a fantastic relief to get to Monday which was the day I'd planned to meet some close friends for a bit of a piss up. The only difference between this and any other piss up was I'd never talked to any of them face to face.

We all got on like a house on fire, all of us.We were all of student age and 5 of the 6 were English but our 6th guildy had come all the way from Switzerland and boy did he get a shock at the English binge drinking activities.

Highlights of the two days:

-Getting lost in a city I've lived in for almost a year
-Ring of Fire
-Drinking from a Wok
-Never have I ever (Lexor you filthy bastard)
-Tactical Chunders at 12 o'clock
-"Ohhhh, I've got heartburn me" "Drink this" "Okay"
-Accidental doubles
-Kaldraith giving it large on the dance-floor
-Tatters the pizza Vigilanty part 1
-Tatters the pizza Vigilanty part 2
-Arthas tactics at 9am, hanging like bastards
-Putting things in the bin...down a flight of stairs
-The search for breakfast
-The further search for breakfast
-Giving up on breakfast and getting a burger
-Drinks at 1pm
-That girl outside WHSmith
-The train ride to Leeds
-Train ride to Dewsbury
-Finally going to fucking sleep

It was a fantastic night out and will definitly be happening again.
Thanks to Bisson, Lexor, Kaldraith, Tatters/Curdle and Yelnasha for a bangin' time! WoW Friiiieeeennnddssss! *thumbs up*

Wednesday, 30 June 2010

A little late to the party...

I've been hitting my head against the Lich King shaped wall for around 7 hours now. It's a fantastically frantic fight which you cannot truely understand while watching a TankSpot video - for one, they make it all look so bloody simple.

We're currently getting some work in on Phase 2 and it's paying off, with our best attempt last night ending at 48%.

Now, Arthas in all his evil wickedness has decided that during Phase two, he's gonna let his little winged minions come in, pick up a raid member and really, really slowly carry them off the edge of the platform. Classic bond villan style. He could order it to fly really fast up and away from us but no, it's gotta move towards the edge in a "hahahahahahahahahaahha-ohshitstunned" kinda way and it's the juggling of Valkyr hitting, Defile dodging, Infest healing that's got us a little bit stuck. But only a little bit.

Highlights of the night for me was jumping off the platform while trying to save my melee partner-in-crime. I was there, dpsing my little heart out, it was all very - "Kirky! Nooooo!" and I completely ignored the edge of the platform. I was all "One more enveno-Oh shit, fell off! ARRRRRRGH!" and a very sheepish "Sorry guys" over Mumble. Having a Shambling Horror jump off after us when we'd decided to wipe it but instead of falling to its doom, decided to pull a very dramatic death mid air and "technically" killing Arthas when he jumped off after our Tank. I demand loot and badges! (Although it was funny watching him falling trying to melee poor Raggy.)

I'm truely enjoying these attempts, I mean, wiping isn't fun but when you get a little bit better after a few wipes and you're either shaving an extra 10% off a boss or doing the first phase and transition flawlessly it really does make you feel like you're getting somewhere. I just hope it doesn't take too long for us to get him to the golden 10%.

Friday, 25 June 2010

The Battle for Warsong Gulch, part 2

Been a while since my last one of these, wasn't really motivated due to the end of exams but I woke up this morning and, mainly through extreme bordem decided to get the next part done. Enjoy! Oh and The font is being really annoying on Blogger at the moment, so I apologise if it looks a little weird

Nalria grunted and braced herself as two walls of shields collided. She could feel Jakkru’s thin fingers holding onto a peice of cloth that the Lieutenant had ordered them to strap round their waists. “HOOOOLD!” the Lieutent bellowed, “Come on, you motherless dogs!” With this, the Horde line surged forward. The solider infront of Nalria backed slightly and she thrust her shield out more, knocking him backward, he clattered into the woman next to him and his shield dropped. In a flash of leather, she saw the slight figure of Jakkru plunge a dagger in the gap between his breastplate and arm. He was behind her once again as they surged forward. Two more humans fell over the man, who was writhing in agony and their frontal attack was broken. “SLAY THEM ALL!” the Lieutenant screamed, as he chopped away at the Humans infront of him.

Juljin was quickly running out of arrows but the flank was holding well. The hunters had dwindled the incomings numbers and the piling bodies and bloody slope made it difficult for them to move. He looked to his right to see the middle of the line locked in combat with humans, night elves and dwarves. He turned back and saw the enemy had stopped trying to get up the slope but instead, had moved to attack the middle of the Hordes thin but resistant line. “Hunters! Support those warriors!” cried the Orc he’d met briefly back at the camp. Juljin ran swiftly, loosing an arrow on the move, it wasn’t as accurate but did hit flesh. A night elf in leather fell to the ground, clutching at the shaft of the arrow, agony engraved all over his face. He let out a slight grin as he steadied himself, the Alliance were playing into the Hordes trap. To his left he could see warriors still fighting but the Hordes numbers were greater than the Alliances on the left hand flank.

“BACK YOU FOOLS! BACK!” Kranan cried. Watching four Warriors breaking from the line, axes in hand. A nearby shaman had wipped them into a Bloodlust and they had dropped their shields, grabbed anything that looked pointed and heavy and ran straight towards the alliance. For a second, the attackers had stopped, in surprise at the two trolls and two orcs which were charging them down. The damage they did was massive, men screamed and bodies flew around but it was over in less than twenty seconds, when, exhausted the Alliance hacked them down and turned to the flank. More warriors had run out to aid the first four and were met by a wave of Alliance Soliders. “GET BACK!” Kranan cried in vain, the Lieutenants plan was falling apart on the right flank. He grabbed a small wooden object from his belt and muttered to himself, he glanced up to see the Alliance advancing quickly. “Earthern spirits, I call on you, I call on you, I CALL ON YOU!” he yelled, ramming the wooden object into the floor with great force. The alliance continued to advance and Kranan felt weakened, his mace felt heavy and the battle cries seemed distant. He was brought back to his senses by the ground shaking.

Nalria and Jakkru worked together, she would create an opening and he would exploit it, they’d drove the attackers down the slope slightly until those from the left flank had joined. Since then, they’d stopped, warriors who were in the second and third ranks had gone to meet the incoming, bloodied alliance and the Lieutenant had ordered them to hold. Jakkru glanced to his right but saw nothing but the other Shadowstalkers and a huge troll who was screaming, his eyes wild with a thirst for blood. The arrows started to pour over them, into the alliance ranks. Screams were heard from the back of the alliance attack. The hunters had been ordered to focus on mages, warlocks and the few hunters the alliance had brought with them. As predicted by the Lieutenant, the Alliance would have relied on their numbers and sent men into the melee, keeping their ranged at the back. His counter to this was to lure the ranged into distance of his hunters bows and cut them down with arrows, it seemed to be working. The arrows stopped and a battle cry was heard, this was the Hordes signal, Nalria shunted her shield into the night elf infront of her repeatably, one of the spikes in her shield must have caught the attacker because he howled and wretched to his side, she hamstringed him and he fell, she thrust her sword into the female solider behind him and she let out a cry of pain, all along the line the other warriors were doing the same and the alliance started to move backward, towards the flatter ground.

The shaking ground had halted the alliance as both sides attempted to steady themselves. With a huge scraping sound, two boulders appeared from the earth. The alliance watched and laughed but stopped immediately as a sound like gravel grinding together pieced the air. The head of a huge Earth elemental had appeared from the ground and the two boulders were its hands, which it was currently pulling itself up with. Two mages behind Kranan had used the distraction as an oppotunitiy to attack and dwarf clad in plate armour had flown backwards and was screaming in agony, his plate glowing molten red, his screams almost drowned out the sound of the elemental as he was burnt alive inside his armour. They continued to cast as the elemental brought itself to a great high and drove it’s fists down, one night elf who had stood still was crushed under one of them, a fleeing human had been caught on the legs and was screaming. The elemental slowly picked his stone fists up and charged, much faster than you would think something made of stone and earth would. The alliance turned tail and ran, with cheers and insults from the remaining Horde soliders on the right flank.