Wednesday, 24 February 2010

The Ballad of the Failing Elitists in which Blizzard mocks me, using axes.

Sitting in Dalaran, talking crap in /g and checking Trade and Looking for Group every now and then while on my hunter and I see this...

"Looking for more for ICC10 - Aiming for Plagueworks bosses, good group so far. Gear check required aswell as Achievement. Need a hunter, mage and Elemental Shaman."

Awesome! I thought, whispered the advertiser, got invited after a quick gear check and greeted with a "Hi there!" - "Welcome!" - "Yay a hunter! :)" I had a good feeling about this PuG, I had a better feeling after inspecting the other members in Dalaran - 44k unbuffed tank, nice little paladin and druid healers.

We get the other members pretty fast and off we went. Me with my good feeling, a bag full of arrows and some buff food.

Trash went down without a single death, reassuring my good feeling. I could definintly see us cruising to Festergut. We set up infront of Marrowgaw, buffed up and off we went.

40 seconds in, we wipe. I couldn't believe it. I mean, how?! This group had promise, the gear, the achievements! What was going wrong?! I looked through Skada, damage was good, people doing 5k+ so we definitly had the dps, plus it hadn't been a lack of dps that had killed us. A tank died first. Did he mess up? I looked at the healing done, everything was good, paladin healer with a tonne of healing and a tonne of overheal. I put it down to fluke, ran back in and got buffed. Ready for round two.

Another wipe. What?!

"lol, sorry guys. Forgot my rings..." goes the tank.

Double You. Tea. Eff?

That's right, our tank hadn't been defence capped for the first two attempts. We hadn't noticed on trash because he'd been afk for a lot of it, picking someone up from somewhere in some kind of car.

We tried again and downed him. An axe I've wanted on my rogue for as long as ICC has been out dropped and I get it on my hunter...god damn you Blizzard. We move on and head to Deathwhisper (who was also the weekly, yay!).

We wiped 5 times on Deathwhisper, 3 of those came from people killing Darnavan, which caused the raid leader to tell us to wipe or loose a chance at 5 badges. The other two, were blatently through lack of healing.

"Sorry [Paladin], but you're not healing enough for this fight, you've got a low gearscore and I dont think you've got the skills to do this." says out leader, after which he/she swiftly kicks our poor paladin who'd been doing a bang up job, in my opinion.

Paladins are fantastic tank healers, if they dont have to move much. Our raid leader had the paladin running from the front of the room to the back to heal the tank who was keeping Darnavan busy and to heal the tank who was tanking the adds. And they wondered why the paladin was struggling...

In comes another paladin, who wouldn't come unless his "imba warlock dps" friend could to. Our leader then KICKS our lowest dps, who wasn't doing too badly - sitting at around 4k total and was last on Marrowgar by a matter of 25dps...

I knew I'd judged this book by it's cover and really, it was a terrible, terrible, group. We wiped twice more on Marrowgar because our trigger happy warlock killed Darnavan and our "awesome pala healer" disconnected. Wonderful.

After getting the weekly done, in a pretty smooth kill (even if it pains me to admit it) we moved on Gunship. Around this time, it became apparent that the "imba warlock dps" was actually shit. Utterly shit. He was in good gear, some ICC10/25 stuff, 2T10 and was doing around 3k...imba dps my arse.

We wiped on Gunship, because the paladin healer was too busy telling a dps in the group that "blue gems in ICC gear is fail." "you fail." "omfg, fail rogue..." and numerous other ways of saying the world "fail."

I gritted my teeth and bared it, vowing the do Saurfang and leave when the "imba warlock dps" started. He was like the little kid, standing at the side of the massive kid who was currently bullying the nerdy kid. Repeating everything he said "omfg, failrogue." I lost it.

"Shut up. I have blue gems in my gear and I'm wiping the floor with you, [imba warlock dps]. Stop repeating everything your retarded paladin friend is saying, you annoying little child."

The reply?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Anyways, I noticed that what they were both saying looked a lot like some of the stuff you see at Elitist Jerks. People (sometimes quite harshly) critising others because of gem, spec and gear choices. Except, these guys were all talk and no action. Failing Elitist wankers. This became apparent when they started critising another warlocks gem choice and specc, even though he was doing the second most dps.

I left after 2 attempts on Saurfang, in which the paladin swore he could solo heal and failed every single time. So, like any respecting person would do. I started HS'ing, dropped group and just before I went "FWOOOOSH." Used /s to put "fail paladin."

I then logged off, to see my hunter using the two axes I have so desperatly wanted to use on my rogue for weeks...Blizzard you pricks.

Anyways, I guess the old saying of "Doing judge a pug by the gear, initial welcome you get when invited or composition, because they could all be drooling failing elitist wankers." Heh.


  1. Heh, this is like the karmic to my opposite to my seemingly-like-a-fail-pug-but-totally-not ICC-10 run a few weeks back... god, that sounds smug.

    I think what I'm trying to say is: what a bunch of knobs. Also the paladin who swore she could solo heal, you have to tell me her name because MAYBE YOU MET THE REAL SNOTTYDIN! :D

  2. Hahaha. It was something like Faerlina or something. She was terrible.

  3. Nightmare!!

    It probably wouldn't have seemed quite so bad if it hadn't all looked so promising :)

    The pally probably wasn't a girl irl if she couldn't solo heal it ;)

    and.. erm.. gratz on the axe /ducks and runs

  4. PUGs are a pain, but luckily they quite often result in something blog worthy.

  5. Further evidence, were any needed, that being "elitist" generally means "holding other people to standards you cannot, yourself, achieve".

    Elitism != Meritocracy

    Also: Blue Gems in ICC Gear **by fucking definition** no worse than blue gems in any other sort of gear. What do they think that the gem bonus scales with ilvl or something?